As Bonesaw said, we conducted plenty of research this weekend. Probably the most important research ever in the history of Metal. What did we discover? You ain't metal unless you got a Jesus Beard.
Tattoos are old news, safety pins all up in your grill were so 2004, and black clothing is simply a uniform. If you want to show that you live and breathe drop C tuning and smashing your forehead into a Camero dashboard while giving the devil sign with both hands, you gotta do it right. Doing it right means growing a long, thick, blowing-in-the-wind beard.
You have to look like you are an absolute fanatic, and nothing says, "I've been hiding in the woods and practicing my power chords and pinch harmonics whilst shunning all of mankind for 10 years," like a rug growing off your face that looks like it's got more woodland creatures living in it than the Appalachian Exhibit at the Knoxville Zoo.
So, how do you pull off this look when you aren't at a concert or band rehearsal? When somebody smirks and asks why you have such a crazy beard, just look them dead in the eyes and coldly say "I was raised by serial killers." Then invite them home for dinner. They'll leave you alone after that.
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