This Weekend will be BRUTAL

Bonesaw and I have all weekend to begin the most important part of recording "Raccoon Mask": More guitars and vocals.

We're talking microphones, laptops, guitars, desktops, amps, guitars, growling, more microphones, growling, and did I mention guitars?

The time is upon us. IT SHALL BEGIN!

Guitars!!

The song is starting to sound more complete. The guitars have been recorded. There is still room for some tweaking here and there but this is mostly where the song is headed. Up next... vocals. Basically when it comes time to record it will go like this. We will eat about 10 pounds of bean burritos from Taco Bell. Then we will drink Vodka and Whiskey until we start to vomit. Then we will attempt to sing the words to Raccoon Mask as our innards flow forth. Should be entertaining if not brutally METAL!! Enjoy the song in it's current state...

New Drum and Bass Tracks

So i spent some time down in the dungeon and laid down some new tracks. What i have created is merely the foundation to our first masterpiece. Join us as we manipulate the strings on our guitars, our vocal chords in our thick yet mildly attractive throats, and the skins on the drums... the journey is just beginning. The storm is gaining strength as we speak. And you will be able to stake claim and shout from the highest peak "I WAS THERE FROM THE GENESIS!!" Yes... it is powerful... wait... that was just gas. Inhale the mighty Bonesaw's flatulance... smells good.

Black Friday

Sounds like the best name for a day - ever. Well, it's not. I was stuck at a relative's house without WiFi, surrounded by a bunch of mealy-mouth mutant munchkins, and then told I had to go shopping for xmas presents. What a load of she0t!

I put on my black shirt and pants, got in my black truck, and went looking for the blackest gift for kids I could think of - Punishment Ponies. I had heard of this toy, something crossed between My Little Ponies and a Marylin Manson punch in the face. Instead of pink, purple, red, yellow, and green little horsies that push sickly-sweet tidings of joy and kindness, every pony is black and actually kicks you in the crotch until you puke.

Long story short, I couldn't find them. I did find this entry about Punishment Ponies in Wikipedia, which reminded me of when my headmaster would whip me with a splintery dowsing rod for being two pence short of a farthing. Ah, memories.

The only joy I truly had on Black Friday was paying a lady to repeatedly bang her shopping cart into Bonesaw's legs. Ha!

@#$%BALLS!!

It's the first thing that popped into my mind when i thought about describing how i feel right now... @#$%BALLS! I should be getting my new guitar tomorrow. If it werent for the holiday weekend i would have had it already. Getting ready to shred for you @#$%. I am looking forward to making some music for you to get drunk and (BLEEP!) up to!! AHHH YER GONNA DIE!!

Working on the tune

Been working on Raccoon Mask a little bit. The drum and bass tracks have been re-recorded and remixed. Sounds much better. Guitars should be coming soon as well as vocal tracks. Should be fun to hear how the sound progresses. Now go... and eat more food!! @#$%heads...

Biggest Shopping Day of the Year

So I got up this morning and went shopping with some of the women that let me eat their Turkeys yesterday. That's a whole different story. So we were at Target (I had to get Guitar Hero III to practice my rock star moves) and this (BLEEP!) kept bumping me with her cart. I mean people everywhere... i cant move and this (BLEEP!) was nudging me with her cart. I was like " WHERE (BLEEP!) DO YOU WANT ME TO GO!!!!" She will rot in hell.

Life is good

Well it's that time of year. Time to give thanks, time to appreciate all of things that you have. I scan my surroundings and life has been good to me. I see about 5 chicks currently in my lair with about 100 or so more waiting outside. The pack of wolves that patrol my acreage are specifically trained. They have the ability to chase off the ones that arent ideal. As for the ones that are left, I'll get to them in due time dont you worry about that. I see my recording studio over there. My amps. My guitars. Two fridges full of beer. Life is good. I want to take this time to pause and remember 2 people that I have lost within the last year. My cousin Joe-Bob and and Uncle Leonard. They were killed in a freak monster truck mishap. They didnt have enough money to get the good seats so they were at top of the seating area. After they drank about $300 worth of beer they decided to go down to the front row and see the action up close. They were so excited when this one truck that shot flames out of the exhaust pipes appeared. The driver gunned it and lost control of the vehicle. The flames melted Joe-Bob and Uncle Leonard. Happy Thanksgiving everybody!!

Important Decisions

I need to go shopping for my wolves. I just have one question... Turkey or Ham??

Garlic Pork

Ate too much Chinese food last night. Took a @#$% this morning that felt like ANGER.

After that, just listened to some Sabbath. Argued with Bonesaw about whether there has ever been harmonica in Death Metal. Has there?

Ok Ok DAMN!!

(Picture changed to be more PC. You sissies!)

Before you (BLEEP!) me I will correct myself. Stinkbait was right. It is correctly spelled RACCOON. But Stinkbait is still a tool. While I am here I will go ahead and answer the first question that will being going through the minds of our fans around the world. "Why write a song about a raccoon?" My initial reply would be to mind your own @#$% business and go back to your pathetic life... but i decided that some of you may need a visual example as to why raccoons are inspirational. Now take this coon. He is determined, resourceful, intelligent, and will go to any means necessary to get what he wants. Those are good qualities to have and we can all learn something from this coon. Now if that isnt inspiring... please somebody post something that is. I look forward to your repsonses. Til next time pansies...

First of all...

Stinkbait is a @#$% tool. It's Racoon not RACCOON. And for those who have listened to the track as it is in it's current state... you may be confused. You might say to yourself "That's not death metal?!?!" Well I say go (BLEEP!)!!! We arent finished yet. We are in the middle of the creative process and we will not be pigeon holed!!! Just kick back, have some alcohol of your choice... it'll be metal enough when we are done. Til next time you pansies...

Raccoon Mask Guitar Riff

I was at Bonesaw's lair the other day, working with him on creating the guitars for Raccoon Mask - our soon to be killer death metal single. Went home, drank half a bottle of Jack, and whipped this bullshit up. It was 4/5ths easier than taking a dump.

Found out later that it is much slower than the base and drums Bonesaw put together on different tracks. WTF? You people are FREAKS!

Here's the bass and drum track -